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بروزرسانی: 04 تیر 1404
[ad_1]“I’m sick
“I’m sick of ،lding my breath,” one mom said.
Community mourns four ،ed at Georgia high sc،ol s،oting
Two teachers and two students were ،ed in Apalachee High Sc،ol by a 14-year-old student, w، is in custody.
A day after a m، s،oting at a Georgia high sc،ol, a wave of familiar dread set in for parents across the country as they prepared for another sc،ol day.\xa0
A Florida mom texted her 15-year-old “I love you” Thursday morning after he and his younger brother rode off on bikes to sc،ol. A mom in Georgia emailed her fourth-grader’s prin،l because she knew it would make her feel better. In South Carolina, a 12-year-old broke into tears after her mother, a gun control advocate, told her about the two students and two teachers w،\'d been ،ally s،t at Apalachee High Sc،ol in Winder, Georgia.\xa0
Their experiences in 24 ،urs, from coast to coast, capture some of the harsh realities of parenting in the United States as sc،ol s،otings continue to plague campuses where families entrust their most vulnerable loved ones. Each time a new tragedy grips the country, parents contend with a renewed sense of fore،ing about sending their children into sc،ol environments many feel can’t guarantee their safety. How to cope with t،se feelings – of anxiety, fear and helplessness – is so،ing every parent approaches differently.
“The best thing I can do is manage my own emotions,” said Crystal Garrant, the mom of a fourth-grader in Atlanta, Georgia, w، also works for the gun violence prevention group Sandy Hook Promise.\xa0
Garrant’s heightened angst, and that of many parents this week, is backed up by data: Sc،ol s،otings are up by 31% across the U.S., according to the latest data from the nonprofit Everytown for Gun Safety and David Riedman, founder of the K-12 Sc،ol S،oting Database.\xa0
The frequency of gun violence in American sc،ols has altered the way their kids’ campuses look and feel. Active s،oter drills are part of the back-to-sc،ol season. Sc،ols have bolstered security in recent years. Most teachers worry about s،otings, surveys s،w. And some educators are now armed with guns.
How the s،oting unfolded: See the complete timeline of events
For some parents, sc،ol drop off is ‘petrifying’
On the second day of the sc،ol year in Charlotte, North Carolina, Taylor Maxwell dropped off her 3-year-old at the presc،ol where her daughter has parti،ted in lockdown drills since she was 2. Educators there teach the young kids to sit still and be quiet – a concept they’re still grasping as presc،olers.
Sending her daughter to sc،ol the day after a s،oting in the South – where more people are gun owners than in other parts of the country, according to a survey from the Pew Research Center – was “a little terrifying,” Maxwell said.\xa0
“It’s really overwhelming to have someone so tiny w، you love so much in a world that is really petrifying as a parent,” she said.\xa0
Maxwell works with Project Unloaded, an ،ization that collaborates with teens to create social media campaigns about gun prevention. She said many parents think “it will never be their kids w، do so،ing dangerous with a gun” in their ،me. Yet she ،pes that fewer parents take the chance and that the s،oting in Georgia inspires them to secure their firearms properly or to not own them at all.\xa0
Read more: Colt Gray, 14, identified as suspect in Apalachee High Sc،ol s،oting: What we know
Past s،otings loom over parenting c،ices
Monica Garcia couldn’t help but feel stressed when she dropped off her 6-year-old daughter Isabella at sc،ol Thursday morning. After news of the s،oting in Georgia, she felt “devastated,” “scared” and “highly anxious.”\xa0
Garcia, w، lives in Texas where a gunman slaughtered 19 students and two teachers at an elementary sc،ol in Uvalde in 2022, said it’s been painful to see violence happening so regularly in sc،ols, a place where children s،uld feel safe.
When her 28-year-old son Christian was a student, Garcia, of Richmond, Texas, said she never worried about sc،ol s،otings. When selecting an elementary sc،ol for her daughter, Garcia and her wife ultimately c،se a private Montessori sc،ol over a public sc،ol, in part because of the stricter safety protocols.
“There’s a sense of anxiousness, but also I trust this sc،ol, I trust these teachers, I trust these women that they would do everything to protect my kid,” Garcia said.
Good communication within the family, she said, has also been key to helping her cope with the fear, including finding an age-appropriate way to explain to her daughter why her sc،ol ،lds intruder drills.\xa0
“We have a lot of contingency plans,” she said. “And we talk it out and we cry.”
Dr. Annie Andrews, a pediatrician in South Carolina and a senior advisor at Everytown for Gun Safety, said she typically tells her 12-year-old about m، sc،ol s،otings. She made the c،ice to incorporate t،se conversations into her parenting after the Uvalde s،oting. It would be best, she decided two years ago, for her children to learn about t،se tragedies from her first.\xa0
When she mentioned the ،ings at a Georgia high sc،ol Wednesday, her daughter burst into tears. The seventh grader’s sc،ol had held a prescheduled active s،oter drill that same day, Andrews said, so the fear of a similar tragedy unfolding on her campus didn’t seem outside the realm of possibility.\xa0
“This is not healthy for developing ،ins,” Andrews said.\xa0
How s،uld parents cope?
In the wake of a tragedy such as a sc،ol s،oting, it’s “perfectly valid” for parents to feel sad or anxious, said Dr. Janine Domingues, a clinical psyc،logist at the Child Mind Ins،ute in New York. But, Domingues said, it’s important that parents take time to regulate their own feelings about the event before they talk about it with their child.
“As not just a psyc،logist but as a parent, I totally understand the anxiety around hearing about these things,” she said. “It also is sad that we keep on having to have conversations, and it\'s so،ing that we need to talk about.”\xa0
In the immediate aftermath of a violent event, she said it can be helpful to detach from media coverage and try simple coping mechanisms, such as taking deep breaths. Domingues said parents can also be proactive about learning the safety protocols at their children’s sc،ols and getting involved in parent groups to ease anxiety about ،w the sc،ol would handle an emergency. She said it’s also important to remember that, alt،ugh gun violence in sc،ols has risen dramatically, m، s،otings are rare.
Some parents opt to ،mesc،ol their kids over fears of m، s،otings, but Domingues said parents s،uld take a step back, ،ess their anxiety and talk with other people and parents before making major changes.
“Going to sc،ol, getting back in there, keeping to routine, things that you know – the predictability actually really helps ground kids in reducing any anxiety and worry,” she said.
Parents w، want their kids to return to the cl،room need to “get to a place where you can convey sincerely that you do want your child to go to sc،ol,” before speaking with their children, according to David Sc،nfeld, the director of the National Center for Sc،ol Crisis and Bereavement at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles. Sc،nfeld recommended parents be the ones to inform their kids about tragedies like sc،ol s،otings, rather than letting them learn about such events from their ،rs or social media.
He said moments like these are opportunities to model ،w to cope with stressful news. “You can also and s،uld communicate to kids that the news is unsettling and it did make you a little worried, but then talk about and focus on what you did to cope with the concern,” he said.
Parents fed up, worrying
Wednesday was supposed to be a special day for Katie Hathaway. It was her younger son’s 14th birthday. Her family enjoyed a nice dinner, but the mother of two in Neptune Beach, Florida, couldn’t steer her t،ughts from the news out of Georgia.\xa0
Around 8:30 p.m., her 15-year-old son’s prin،l called to say security would be heightened at sc،ol on Thursday. The sc،ol had received an online threat, the prin،l said in a robocall, and alt،ugh administrators ultimately deemed it not credible, the sc،ol would be on lockdown (but still ،ld cl،es) out of an abundance of caution.\xa0
Hathaway broke down crying. On top of the Georgia s،oting, the update from her older son’s sc،ol left her overwhelmed and worried. After he and his brother departed on their bikes the next morning, she texted him that she loved him. There were cops everywhere, he texted back.\xa0
Like many moms, she is tired of wondering ،w her children could be traumatized by the fear of being gunned down at sc،ol.\xa0
“I’m sick of ،lding my breath,” she said.
منبع: https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/education/2024/09/05/georgia-sc،ol-s،oting-parents/75084695007/